


Daddy Issues

by memeberd



Category: Captain Underpants - Fandom
Genre: Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Gen, im very tired
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-29
Updated: 2017-05-29
Packaged: 2018-11-06 07:10:35
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 848
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11031195
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/memeberd/pseuds/memeberd
Summary: im going off of what little i've read of the first book, one page talking about how Harold's parents got divorced and all the footage we've seen of the movie so far. so there you go.





	Daddy Issues

“Okay, George,” Harold started, “I’ve been thinking about this for a while now and I think I know how we can make this work!” He looked back to George who was trudging a few inches behind him, dragging along their unconscious principal who still believed he was the Amazing Captain Underpants in a wagon.

George looked tired, his eyelids gave it away the most. In contrast, Harold’s were wide open with excitement.

“This?” George motioned to the fat thirty-something year old sleeping away in only his underwear and a cape fashioned from a window curtain. “This isn’t gonna work.”

“No no!” Harold insisted. “Just think of all the good he’ll do now! All we have to do is tell him about Mr. Krupp’s life, give him the important facts n’ stuff and he’ll be the best superhero principal ever!”

“Harold, did you forget everything that happened the past couple hours?” George asked. “He chased down every minor inconvenience and robbery he could find tryin' to fix everything until we could distract him enough! And then when we got him to the treehouse, he knocked himself unconscious!”

“Yeah, but that last part was kind of our fault ‘cuz we kept switching him back and forth,”

“Yeah, that’s a fair point, but I still don’t think it’s gonna work. He’s gotta stay at school for as long as Mr. Krupp normally would, and anything could happen in that time to get Captain Dumb-Dumb to leave.”

 _“Don’t call him that!”_ Harold was obviously offended.

“Well he _is_ pretty stupid!” 

“We can...” Harold thought longer. “We can teach him self control!”

“I’m not buyin’ the dog treats to train him with.” George snapped.

 _“What is your deal?”_ Harold exclaimed.

 _“I’m draggin’ a near naked Principal Krupp around in a WAGON!”_ George shouted, throwing the handle of the wagon down into the dirt. George stared at the ground for a while before looking back up at Harold. “This was really fun at first, Harold. But it’s not anymore, it’s just not. We’re going too far now. Why are you trying so hard to keep somebody that doesn’t exist?”

“What do you mean he doesn’t exist?? He’s in our wagon!”

George stared blankly at Harold. 

Harold felt his face heat up, he was most likely visibly red from George’s point of view. “We made Captain Underpants. We made him together, we made him to be reliable and virtuous!” Harold started to pace back and forth. 

“Harold,”

Harold broke his walking pattern to get in George’s face. “That’s not like Mr. Krupp! What does Mr. Krupp do? Hmm, let’s see!”

“Harold,” George tried again. Harold went back to pacing infront of George.

“He confiscates all our comics, he took our skateboards, our slingshots-- oh, oh, _no._ None of _that_ matters though, none of that could compare to earlier today when he was trying to separate us!!” He heard George sigh.

“Look, Harold, if we change him back for good, we… We could just hypnotize him again but to make him forget he wanted to put us in different class rooms in the first place!” George offered.

“Cap loves us, George.” Harold argued. “Why don’t you want to keep that?”

“Because Mr. Krupp’s got his own life.” George explained. “Who knows what could-”

George stared at Harold as if he’d finally figured out something left unanswered in a book he had been reading. George’s stomach dropped and he reached out a hand toward Harold.

“This is about your dad, isn’t it?” George quietly asked. Harold’s eyes widened.

“What?” Harold was visibly shocked. Now it was his turn for his stomach to drop.

“You want somebody like Cap to be there for you.” George stated, reaching farther out to touch his friend. Harold dodged George’s hand like it was covered in thorns.

“No, _shut up, that’s not what it is.”_ Harold said. George knew Harold hated talking about his dad, but he also knew when it was time to peel off a dirty bandage.

“Yes it is! You just said, Cap loves us, and he’s reliable! Your dad’s gone so he couldn’t _possibly_ be any of those things.” Perhaps George was being too blunt for Harold to handle.

Because what happened next involved Harold trying to block out George’s words by yelling and shoving him away.

 _“Don’t talk about him!”_ Harold shrieked.

George grunted and kept his eyes firm on Harold’s. Those brown eyes knew exactly what was wrong. And it stung.

It stung, and it itched, and it strangled at Harold until hot tears were pouring down his cheeks. 

“I’m sorry, George,” Harold whimpered. “I’m sorry I shoved you,” he sobbed.

George rushed to Harold and hugged him tight. “It’s okay, we’re gonna get through this, it’s gonna be okay…” he whispered as he soothingly rubbed Harold’s back and pet his curly blonde hair. George hugged tighter when he heard him hiccuping into his shoulder.

 _“I’m so sorry I shoved you,”_ Harold repeated.

“It’s okay, I promise I won’t talk about your dad anymore until you’re ready…” George murmured. Harold only cried harder into George’s shoulder.


End file.
